Tragic,Ticklish and Totally Timothean!

What do you have to lose?

The one that got away
By: Mark J. Macapagal

In your life, you'll make note of a lot of people.
Ones with whom you shared something special, ones who
will always mean something. There's the one you first
kissed, the one you first loved, the one you lost your
virginity to, the one you put on a pedestal, the one
you're with...and the one that got away.

Who is the one that got away? I guess it's that person
with who everything was great, everything was perfect,
but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in
the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but
the cards just didn't fall the right way, I suppose.

I believe in the fact that ending up with someone,
finding a longtime partner that is, does not lie merely
in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal
part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with
the matter of timing. It has to do with you being ready
to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes
beyond the little niceties of giddy romance.

How often have you gone through it without even realizing
it? When you're not ready to commit in that mature manner,
it doesn't matter who you're with, it just doesn't work.
Small problems become big; inconsequentials become
dealbreakers simply because you're not ready and it shows.
It's not that you and the person you're with are no good;
it's just that it's not yet right, and little things become
the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you're ready. You really are. And when this
happens you'll be ready to settle down with someone. He or
she may not be the most perfect, they might not be the
brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your
life, but it'll work because you're ready. It'll work
because it's the right time and you'll make it work.
And it'll make sense, it really will.

So that day comes when you're finally making sense of
things, and you find yourself to be a different person.
Things are different, your approach is different, you
finally understand who you are and what you want, and you've
become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind
you, there's no telling when this day will come.
Hopefully you're single but you could be in a long-term
relationship, you could be married with three kids, it
doesn't matter. All you know is that you've changed, and
for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person
you think about.

You'll think about them because you'll wonder, "What if they
were here today?" You'll wonder, "What if we were together now,
with me as I am and not as I was?" That's what the one that
got away is. The biggest "What if?" you'll have in your life.

If you're married, you'll just have to accept the fact that the
one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy
tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of
us. But hopefully you're mature enough to realize that you're
already with the one you're with and this is just another test
of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage
when you get past it. Sure, you'll think about him/her every so
often, but it's alright. It's never nice to live with a
"might have been," but it happens.
Maybe the one that got away is the one who's already married.
In which case it's the same thing. You just have to accept and
know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice
little smile to your lips in the future when you're old and gray
and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then it's different. What do
you do if it's not yet too late? Simple...find him, find her.
Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that
you'll always wonder, what if you got that one?

Ask him out to coffee, ask her out to a movie, it doesn't matter
if you've dropped in from out of nowhere. You'd be surprised,
you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person
who is your "the one that got away."

You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won't make a
difference. If the timing is finally right, it'll all just fall
into place somehow and you know, I'm thinking, it would be a great
feeling, in the end, to be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you're
the one that almost got away."

Tim - Here's another quote I found today that just made so much sense. I don't think I've ever seen it worded any better.

"Sometimes, though, it's the relationships that don't work out that teach us the most about ourselves, and what we're really looking for in that special someone." - Russ Dimino.

Interestingly enough he was talking about the many women in the life of Superman before he found Lois Lane. As you know I'm a huge fan of Smallville and he ends his article on Kryptonsite.com saying ...

"With Lois, Clark found someone who could love both the farmboy and the superhero."

I believe the perfect person in our life will love us for all our aspects and not just the ones we want to be loved for.

~Totally Tim - Deep in thought.

posted by Timmy Tim Tim @ 2:44 AM